Take Me Out…

Alas, another cold winter morning wherein I grip the handlebars and try desperately to keep my eyes open in the gusting arctic wind as I wind my way down the mountain to work. Oh, if only there were some sort of hope to keep me warm. A small glint of the coming season that would flood into my being and ward off the flurries of winter. BUT WAIT…

There are only 21 days until the first voluntary report date for Spring Training. Granted, OpeningBaseball Day is not til April 1, but the mere thought of Spring Training thrills my heart. Plus, I believe the first college game here in town is on February 13, so that means there will be baseball soon; a mere two weeks away. The smell of freshly mown grass, the rough texture of a warm peanut as it crumbles between your fingers, the crack of the bat as a well hit double finds its way to the wall. Oh Lord, why can’t we have baseball all the time? The cynics there among you will tout steroids and over-inflated salaries as reasons to dismiss the notion of the grand old game, but that will not stand. That is the business of baseball. The true game itself is flawless; an elegant ballet between teams that can take place in any spare spot of land on earth. A stick, an object to hit, and a desire for camaraderie among fellow friends is all that is necessary for the game of baseball.

But for the moment winter reigns *shaking my fist* but baseball shall come again shortly and all will be right with the world.

AND NOW, the Friday Five…only today’s is the Friday Fifty-Five, because yet again I’m avoiding work.

  1. Is your second toe longer than your first? Yes, and if the old tale about this proving intelligence is true, then I’M BRILLIANT!
  2. Do you have a favorite type of pen? Yes, doesn’t everyone. I’m currently addicted to the Bic Grip Roller Micro.
  3. Look at your planner for March 14, what are you doing? What’s a planner? My calendar says it’s a Wednesday, so I’ll be at choir practice.
  4. What color are your toenails usually? Usually they’re toenail color. What is that…peach, pink? I don’t know.
  5. What was the last thing you highlighted? Wire transfer instructions on a disbursement form at work.
  6. What color are your bedroom curtains? They’re white and sheer I think, with little flowers on them. They match the comforter on the bed.
  7. What color are the seats in your car? The ones in the Honda are dark gray, almost black. The ones in the Toyota are gray. The one on my bike is black.
  8. Have you ever had a black and white cat? Yes…we have two, named Peach and Red. And if you know anyone that would give them a good home, they’re up for adoption.
  9. What is the last think you put a stamp on? A bill I’m sure. That’s the only thing I put stamps on these days.
  10. Do you know anyone who lives in Wyoming? Personally? No. But I think Harrison Ford lives in Jackson Hole.
  11. Why did you withdraw cash from the ATM the last time? I’m sure it’s because we were going out. It might have been for a hair cut though. No wait…it was while we were in Paris, so it was for Metro tickets or something.
  12. Who is the last baby that you held? Emma Grace, my niece.
  13. Do you know of any twins with rhyming names? I don’t think so. All the twins I knew had names that were different sounding.
  14. Do you like Cinnamon toothpaste? No, definitely not. I like my toothpaste minty, but not too minty and not too bubbly either.
  15. What kind of car were you driving 2 years ago? The Corolla. We’ve had it for 4 years now.
  16. Pick one: Miami Hurricanes or Florida Gators I’d have to go with the Gators on this one. The Hurricanes just seem to be a bunch of thugs.
  17. Last time you went to Six Flags? I don’t think I’ve ever been to Six Flags. Not my thing.
  18. Do you have any wallpaper in your house? We do have some leftover wallpaper in the upstairs bathroom…but wallpaper has been pretty much banned from the house.
  19. Closest thing to you that is yellow: There’s a yellow post-it note mere inches from my keyboard.
  20. Last person to give you a business card? I think Clay gave me his business card so that I’d have his email address. I don’t really work in the business card world.
  21. Who is the last person you wrote a check to? I don’t write checks. C writes the checks. Although, I think I wrote a check to the furnace guy when she wasn’t home back in November.
  22. Closest framed picture to you? There’s a picture of me and C on the desk. It’s sort of framed in that it slides into a picture holder, but I wouldn’t really consider that a frame.
  23. Last time you had someone cook for you? Last night. We let ZA’s do the cooking. Also, I had an Arrogant Bastard to drink. Top notch ale, that one.
  24. Have you ever applied for welfare? No, but I’ve wanted to. And if health insurance continues to go up, I may have to.
  25. How many emails do you have? I assume you mean addresses and I have two that I check regularly. As for actual emails, I think I have over 150 total.
  26. Last time you received flowers? I don’t think I’ve ever received flowers. At least, not that I remember. But that reminds me…
  27. Do you think the sanctity of marriage is meant for only a man & woman? No. I think with the divorce rate what it is today the “sanctity” of marriage is a little overrated.
  28. No Question
  29. Do you play air guitar? Like the God of Rock himself!
  30. Do you take anything in your coffee? I take whatever will make it taste less like coffee. Cream, sugar, vanilla, whipped cream, chocolate chips.
  31. Do you have any Willow Tree figurines? I have no idea what that even is! Now I do, and I think we have one Willow Tree ornament.
  32. What is your high school’s rival mascot? I’d have to say the main rival mascot was a Viking. LONG LIVE THE SNOWMAN!
  33. Last person you spoke to from high school? Actually spoke to, or emailed. Spoke to: Angie. Emailed: Lorie.
  34. Last time you used hand sanitizer? I try and avoid hand sanitizer at all costs. I think it’s a government conspiracy to brainwash us.
  35. Would you like to learn to play the drums? No, not really. Maybe some other instrument.
  36. What color are the blinds in your living room? They are a mottled brown. They’re bamboo I think.
  37. What is in your inbox at work? I don’t really have an inbox per se, but my desk is covered with things on my “To Don’t” list.
  38. Last thing you read in the newspaper? The obituaries. Like my mom says, if you’re in the obituaries in the morning, you don’t have to go to work that day.
  39. What was the last pageant you attended? I can thankfully say I’ve never attended a pageant. Sweet Lord, what a nightmare. Have you seen Little Miss Sunshine?
  40. What is the last place you bought pizza from? That would’ve been ZA’s. See Number 23.
  41. Have you ever worn a crown? Daily. I am the Prince of Instrument Rental, the Duke of Disbursement Forms, the Baron of Evaluations.
  42. What is the last thing you stapled? I believe it was some disbursement form at work.
  43. Did you ever drink Clear Pepsi? Yeah, it was freaky because you expected it to taste like Sprite or something, but it was definitely Pepsi-flavored.
  44. Are you ticklish? A little, but I can subdue my ticklishness so it’s not always easy to tickle me.
  45. Last time you saw fireworks? I think it was at a Bat’s game. That’s generally where I see fireworks.
  46. Last time you had a Krispy Kreme doughnut? Oh man, I can’t remember, but I’d give anything for a hot one right now.
  47. Who is the last person that left you a message & you actually returned their call? Mike Tracy, against my better judgment.
  48. Last time you parked under a carport? Years ago when I lived with my folks.
  49. Do you have a black dog? No.
  50. Do you have any pickles in your fridge? I’m sure there are some in there. They may be 3 years old, but they’re probably in there.
  51. Are you an aunt or uncle? Yes, I’m an uncle to beautiful little Emma Grace.
  52. Who has the prettiest eyes that you know of? My sweet baboo, C.
  53. Last time you saw a semi truck? Yesterday, on my way home from the gym.
  54. Do you remember Ugly Kid Joe? Barely. I did know an ugly kid named Joe once though. *laughing*
  55. Do you have a little black dress? Yes, but it doesn’t fit any more.

Okay, so that should keep you busy most of Friday. Angie, if you’ve gotten this far, you have to do actual work now. Mom, if you’ve gotten this far, thanks for the tip on National Kazoo Day yesterday. Ryan, if you got this far, shouldn’t silent reading time be about over now?

March to the Mini update 

See you in the funny papers!

2 thoughts on “Take Me Out…

  1. WOW!!! That wasted a good 10 minutes. Now if I fill this thing out that will be a least a good 15 minutes or so. Work is on the “To don’t list” today! Thanks for providing such a great service.

    LOVE LOVE LOVE the picture of Emma. 🙂

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